They say “breaking up is hard to do.” And if we’re talking about relationships, yes. It is hard. But when it comes to doing work—especially creative work—breaking things up doesn't just make things easier to do. It’s essential. Let me explain. About two years ago, when I sent a new full manuscript to our agent, I thought the story was finished. Dear reader, it wasn’t done. Far from it. I was the one who was done, apparently. So when she responded with several pages of editorial notes, I literally blacked out. I wasn’t mad. The notes were spot on. I was just completely drained of energy from everything—and I mean everything—life had thrown at me, which is another story for another post. At that point, I decided that I needed to focus on just surviving each week. Then I put the manuscript away and couldn’t look at it for nearly two years. Throughout that time, it kept gnawing at me. This was a story I wanted to tell. It was a more emotional one, a more difficult one. But I just couldn’t muster the energy to work through it. Finally, my brain said, “OKAY, fine! I’ll do this thing.” But it still felt like too much. Too big and overwhelming for my perpetually overloaded mind to tackle. So I decided to trick it. I told myself that I just need to do one page at a time. Just one. And if I do more, great! So I made it a point to wrestle with one page a day. After that was done, I’d add a sticker to the chart. My goal was to do some hardcore revision on 100 pages, since those were the hardest, which is why the chart has 100 boxes. Okay, sure. It’s an elementary school vibe. But I’m telling you: it works! Doing this for several days actually lifted me from my creativity block and helped me build some much needed momentum. And actually seeing my progress has been very motivating. So if you’re facing a big project and you feel paralyzed by the sheer size and scope of it, trick your mind. Break it up. You don’t need stickers. But you DO want to try to do one single, quantifiable piece at a time. Because baby steps are still steps. After a few days of this, my hope is that you’ll look back and feel good about your progress. And that’s how life works, isn’t it? It’s not about having these gigantic, Earth-shattering accomplishments each and every day. It’s the habitual small actions we take that eventually add up to meaningful results. Writing Updates: Aside from me re-working a new manuscript, Jon’s nearly done inking the pages for the THREE BEE HONEY Crowdfundr campaign. This endeavor has been much slower than we’d like, but we’re making progress each day. Jon’s even been inking pages during our sons’ baseball games, as you can see here. Current Read: Hello, Universe, by Erin Entrada Kelly I just started reading this book, which explores friendships that surprise us and the self-acceptance that grounds us. Right away, I was pulled into Hello, Universe as it opens with Virgil, a shy boy who’s guarding a big secret. Often misunderstood by his family, Virgil struggles with the angst of growing up and not fitting in. Each chapter switches point-of-view between the four middle school characters, which kept me turning the pages. Furthermore, I love how even the supporting characters are developed with so much depth and personality: like Virgil’s opinionated grandma, Lola, who’s from the Philippines. Kelly expertly plots each scene, twisting it in ways that force Virgil into an adventure with these unlikely friends. While I haven’t finished the book yet, I already can see how rich the characters are in the world Kelly built. This is definitely a story I would’ve found solace in during my middle school years. Pet Pics: Lilo is just like me: if it’s under 70 degrees outside, we’re freezing and MUST wear a hoodie all day. Amelie and Finn try their best to fit on top of their tower and watch the rainfall. Sanity Corner: I’m an absolute sucker for inspirational quotes. So much so that I keep a growing list of them on my phone. Later, when I want to share one with a friend or a stranger, boom! I’ve got the perfect, mic-dropping line. Well, maybe it’s not mic-dropping. But it’s at least thought-provoking. And that’s good enough for me. I also have this calendar with quotes for each day of the year. It’s a very small but fun way to set the tone for the day. The insufferable teacher in me sometimes asks one of my kids to read it aloud and share what they think it means. I can’t help but turn everything into a teachable moment. #sorrynotsorry That’s all for today. Thank you so much for reading! I’ll be in touch again next month.
Feel free to share this little newsletter with anyone who’d enjoy it! :) Take care, Desi
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I hate clutter. I hate how stressful and overwhelming it feels to be around a lot of stuff—especially when dealing with a small amount of space. In fact, my ideal home would look like an Ikea catalog if I had any control over my living situation (I don’t…I have kids and pets lol). My home would be a soft, comfortable, and functional space, but definitely minimal. And simple. However, unlike our physical realm, our minds have infinite space for whatever we want to pack it with. And because ideas need inspiration and our ideas come from our beautiful brains, it’s helpful to deposit lots of details instead of keeping it clutter free. So it’s time to fill ‘er up. Pack it with all kinds of information. Observations. Trivia. Questions. Everything. But all that inspiration hoarding shouldn’t come from one place (I’m looking at you, TikTok). Don’t rely on social media for all of your “research.” Get outside and look around. Notice what you notice. What people are doing. What they’re wearing. What they’re NOT doing. How people are eating. Which places attract people and why. Which places need upkeep. And if you’re stuck on a personal or work project or feeling “blah” about something that feels stale or you're just out of dank meme material, change your routine. Then download every detail you can about your day. I’ve started using this strategy myself, and it has improved my ability to brainstorm ideas more quickly. Now when I stare at my screen, I can make the cursor move on command with a list of some starter ideas. And some of those have the potential to actually be good ones. Picasso once said that “Inspiration exists, but it has to find you working.” So work at it by shaking things up and noticing the world around you. Then commit what you observe to your memory. You never know when it might come in handy when you need some fresh inspiration down the line. Current Read: How to Get Ideas, by Jack Foster My earlier manifesto was inspired by this book. Jack Foster does a great job of inspiring and teaching us how to turn on that radar in our minds to find ideas. They are all around us, if we pay attention. How to Get Ideas is a super easy read and great for anyone who wants to find inspiration, whether it is for work or personal projects. One specific exercise he suggests is to spend time really, truly observing our surroundings and then write down specific observations we have each day, which can be completely random. But the act of noticing helps us exercise that inner muscle and see more going forward. Here are some things I noted on day one during my work commute on the train: -Most people’s heads were down, looking at their phones. -A teenage boy had his basketball shoes untied and seemed unbothered by it. I also noted how the untied laces touching the train floor gave me the ick. -A man standing on the train was reading an art history book with black and white images. -I’ve been reading a new poem each day, and this one poem was about loss and how we hide our grief in the shadows of our smiles. #deep Pet Pics: Lilo being a brave little pup as she gets her annual shots. Don’t worry, she got extra cuddles. Amelie soaks up a little sunshine (and superiority) from her window perch. Garden Update: Our lemon and grapefruit trees have no chill and produced a lot of fruit this month. At first, I wasn’t thrilled about grapefruit—I didn’t eat it growing up. But now in my ripening years, I’ve developed a taste and enjoy them without any added sweetener. No judgment here if you like a little sugar on yours, lol. Sanity Corner: Jon got me into this podcast called Ologies, with Allie Ward, where she interviews experts on everything from black holes to apples to near death experiences. Every episode is fascinating and super engaging (Allie is such a funny host!). I’m always looking forward to learning from Allie and her team.
She also has “Smologies,” which are shorter, kid-friendly episodes for younger audiences. Please check it out, and challenge yourself to listen to something you know nothing about. As you listen, the episode will suck you right into that wonderful rabbit hole of curiosities. That’s all for today. Thank you so much for reading! I’ll be in touch again soon. Feel free to share this little newsletter with your friends! :) Take care, Desi Here’s a short, sweet poem by one of my favorite poets: Just as the hare is zipping across the finish line, the tortoise has stopped once again by the roadside, this time to stick out his neck and nibble a bit of sweet grass, unlike the previous time when he was distracted by a bee humming in the heart of a wildflower. ~ Billy Collins, Horoscopes for the Dead This poem reminds me of the Frog and Toad memes I started seeing on the Interwebs about a year ago: a Gen Z reaction against hustle culture. I’ve always operated like the hare in Collins’ poem. But I’ve envied the tortoise and have realized how wise he really is. We’re all racing somewhere. Racing to the job title. Racing to the accolades. Racing—and stressing and worrying along the way—to whichever status symbol that tells the world we finally made it. But who really cares? The world is so much bigger than us and our precious little myopic egos. It’s healthy to zoom out far away from ourselves and hold on to that perspective. It’s humbling, but it’s calming, too. A friend shared this in a moment of frustration, and I laughed. So true though, right? Once we cross a finish line, we manufacture another “finish line” to race toward. And then we go on social media, see what others have done, and feel inadequate all over again. Then we dream up new benchmarks. It goes on and on. And it’s exhausting. Sure, we can set goals and strive for them. But that requires balance. We need to remember to stop by the roadside once in a while. Touch the soft grass, feel the breeze and warm sun on our skin. Like Frog and Toad: My goal is to do this more myself. And I’ve been surprised by how hard it is after being conditioned to rush and race from one task to the other for so many years. So slow down. Be present. Enjoy the journey and stop to marvel at the insects along the way. There’s no rush. Writing Update: Jon has finished inking page 40 of Three Bee Honey—hooray! Progress has been slower than we’d hoped, but we’re inching closer each day. Here’s a sneak peek at one of the pages with Claire, Hannah, and Abi learning about the waggle dance: So cute! Recent Read: The Bluest Eye, by Toni Morrison I read this book back in college. And now that I’ve had more life experience under my belt, I felt it was worth revisiting, and I’m enjoying it even more. I also wanted to re-read it since it recently stirred up so much controversy and has even been banned in school districts around the country. The Bluest Eye explores beauty standards and racial identity. It’s about a Black girl named Pecola who is growing up in the Jim Crow South. She dreams of having blue eyes because she feels that will make her beautiful, and in that yearning, we see the pain and tragedy that inspires it. Toni Morrison’s prose is both beautiful and raw. Every book I’ve read by her is filled with passages that make me slam on the breaks, reverse, and re-read because I’m so shocked she actually “went there.” While her stories aren’t for the faint of heart, and this one explores many uncomfortable topics (definitely not for young ones), they cut to the core of human nature with devastating elegance and should be read by as many people as possible. I highly recommend this book! Pet Pics: Lilo enjoying a lazy moment (and a cozy sweater) as her mom works. Finn keeping an eye out for his special outdoor cat friend. Garden Update: Our blood oranges are back in bloom, which means some yummy juice in the mornings. In the past, we’ve made marmalade with the fruit, but life is just too crazy at the moment, so maybe next year. Sanity Corner:
Circling back to the poem by Billy Collins, one of the things I love to do when I want to slow down is going on walks. When I’m in the office or working from home, I try to take a break and go outside to clear my head. Just a 10 minute walk works wonders. If you can, squeeze in one 10 minute walk into your daily routine: before work, during the work day, or after. If we can spend 10-30 minutes doom scrolling, we can manage a short walk. :) It’s well worth the effort. Welp...that’s all for this month. Thank you so much for reading! I’ll be in touch again in February. :) Take care, Desi I hope you all had a restful holiday with your loved ones! I finally have a second to breathe after the craziness of the holidays, and I wanted to get in touch before the ball drops in 2024. Plus let’s face it: my productivity took a precipitous drop this week. As we disembark from the absolute rollercoaster that was 2023, I thought I’d reflect on the ups and downs of the past 12 months. Challenges:
Highlights:
I won’t kid myself by anticipating 2024 will be a smooth ride by any stretch of the imagination. After all, I’m an elder millennial who’s lived through decades of “unprecedented events.” But I know we have the tools to survive what comes our way, which reminds me of an old proverb: “A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.” Writing Update: Jon is still inking the TBH pages. Juggling parenting and teaching middle school and life is hard, fam. However, he’s getting the pages done--slowly but surely. Jon at the end of the work day—and at the end of 2023. Recent Read: The Creative Act, by Rick Rubin A fellow copywriter at work recommended this book a few months ago. Around the same time, Jon bought it and loved it. Once he finished, he passed The Creative Act to me to read for inspiration through some serious writer’s block I was having. This book is 100% deserving of all the hype. I’ve felt grounded by Rick Rubin’s immense wisdom. And I mean so. Much. Wisdom. Another thing I’ve grown to appreciate in non-fiction books like this one: I love the short chapters. We are always hustling and rushing from one thing to the next, but if I have 10 minutes or so, I can read a chapter, fully digest it, and feel like I learned something instead of stopping halfway and letting the main idea dissipate into thin air. Pet Pics: Lilo turned 2 on Christmas Eve! Here she is with her little holiday headband. Here are Finn and Amelie working hard at competitive napping. Sanity Corner: I know I’m late to the game, but I finally started using “Do Not Disturb” mode on my phone. And holy moly—what a difference it has made!
Text messages can be a huge distraction when you’re trying to establish a workflow or focus on other tasks--even if that TikTok video your friend sent IS hilarious. It’s been so effective at blocking notifications, that I’ve set my phone to DND every day, even on weekends. If you haven’t tried “Do Not Disturb,” I strongly recommend it if you want to reduce distractions. That’s it for now. Thank you so much for reading! I’ll be in touch again in 2024. Have a Happy New Year, everyone! :) Take care, Desi Recently, a former student reached out to grab some lunch. So we met up at a local cafe when she was finished with her college classes. Having been out of the classroom for over five months, I felt like I’ve been shedding my “teacher” identity. No longer reacting to the bell each hour. No longer grading papers every single day. But hearing her exclaim, “Mrs. St. Amant!” brought me back to that part of myself. Me hearing “Mrs. St. Amant” for the first time in months. We chatted about our lives and what we were up to. She told me how she was enjoying her college experience and meeting new people with similar interests. When she asked me about my job, I shared how much fun I was having working in such a different world, but I also mentioned the feeling of uncertainty and how uncomfortable it felt to grapple with more unknowns nowadays. She smiled and said, “I remember when you talked to us about college…how we were so anxious and worried about getting an acceptance. You said that things have a way of working out. Remember?” Yep. I remembered saying that. How easy it was for my old self to say. If only the old Desi knew what was in store. Then she continued, “Once we made our college decisions, we were still anxious. But this time, it was about our future and whether or not we made the right choice.” I smiled. It was all coming back to me. And it felt so bittersweet this time. I sipped my tea and listened. She added, “You told us that we don’t change when we’re comfortable. When we experience discomfort, we can grow into our better selves.” I chuckled. Dang, that Mrs. St. Amant could be wise…sometimes. At that moment, I realized that I needed to hear those words. And I was so filled with gratitude that my former student gave me such a helpful reminder from my past. Sometimes our past comes back to haunt us. But if we’re lucky, our past will come back to guide us just when we need it. I’ll leave you with a quote from one of my favorite poets, Maya Angelou: “I have great respect for the past. If you don’t know where you’ve come from, you don’t know where you’re going. I have respect for the past, but I’m a person of the moment. I’m here, and I do my best to be completely centered at the place I’m at, then I go forward to the next place.” Writing Update: Jon has finished penciling the comic. People, he has FINISHED. Life was wayyyy busier than we had predicted. Now he’s inking the pages. The more complex pages take a bit longer (due to more detail), but things are moving along. We’re also working on strengthening a concept for Ruby & Copper, a story we’d been chewing on for the past year. We love the characters and have been brainstorming concepts, and we finally feel like we have a solid idea. Working logline: Ruby wants nothing more than to be accepted by her community, and she feels that winning the local baking competition will get her there. But her inner monster, Egara, keeps getting in the way. She must learn to tame Egara or she’ll lose the last connection to her town. Here it is, our very first peek at an Egara sketch! Recent Read: Steal Like an Artist, by Austin Kleon This book was such a fun, quick read! I finished it after two days (I could’ve finished it in one day if I didn’t have work). Kleon’s writing style is accessible, engaging, and funny. I dog-eared many pages as I read his insights. Furthermore, I also appreciated how Kleon included illustrations to make each point super clear and memorable. Beyond his life lessons and insights on creativity, what I loved most was how the book gives us permission to seek inspiration from other ideas. Unlike imitation or plagiarism, we’re giving the inspiration our own twist and making it new and fresh (hence, “stealing” like an artist). This is a book I’ll definitely re-read when I’m in a rut and need some quick inspiration to get going again! Pet Pics: Finn and Amelie are back to being besties despite Finn hanging out with Lilo more often lately. Meanwhile, Lilo loves to get snuggly in her blanket on my work from home days. Sanity Corner: This is a little late, but Jon and I watched Fantastic Fungi a few months ago and found it so fascinating. We had no idea what to expect, but it was such an engaging and intriguing documentary. The complexity of fungi and the potential implications for helping people suffering with mental illness gives me hope. I look forward to seeing more research on this plant’s potential for healing. That’s it for now. Thank you so much for reading! I’ll be in touch again in December.
If you have a bestie (or even a frenemy) who’d like this newsletter, don’t hesitate to share this with them. :) Take care, Desi I’m sure we’ve all been seeing the “back to school” displays in stores and posts on social media. In past years, I’d see them and cringe/laugh knowingly, remembering that my summer was skidding to a sudden halt. I’d resign myself to the oncoming chaos and grit my teeth at the avalanche of work I’d face for 10 months straight. But at least I didn’t have to struggle alone. I had fellow teachers going through it with me, sharing the struggle from the trenches. But that’s not happening this year. This year, I’m not going back to school. This year, I’m on my own uncharted path. And that realization has got me feeling some type of way. Kinda twisty and sad. Kinda relieved. Definitely shook. Definitely unsure. This is real. I made a “big girl” decision and I’m sitting with my big girl feelings now. I understand that these emotions are normal when facing a big change. Rest assured: I’ll work through those in time, and if I need a stronger outlet, maybe I’ll get myself a pinata when the going gets tough. Sanity Corner: Speaking of big feelings, I’ve been trying to meditate more to help myself keep calm. Lately, I’ve been using a meditation app (Headspace) to do that. I appreciate the menu of options for whichever state of mind you find yourself in. I’ve even introduced it to my family to help us pause and have mindful breaks. Since life is so busy, I tend to go for the shorter ones, but they still feel helpful. Campaign Updates: The campaign is in its last few days--what a whirlwind! We mentioned earlier that Three Bee Honey will feature guest artists. Here are the talented illustrators featured in your copy of the book. As we head toward the finish line, we are pushing ahead to try to reach our second and final stretch goal: $4,500, which will allow us to expand the story. What’s in it for you? More world-building, more story, and more of the adventure. We know it’s within reach, so spread the word to people you know who would enjoy this book. If you haven’t had a chance to order your book, be sure to do it asap! Also, because we met our first goal, those who purchase a physical copy of the book will receive a FREE Three Bee Honey bookmark set! This offer expires at 12am on Monday, 8/21 at so don’t miss out! This week, we have a livestream event for the Kids Comics Unite Community, where we will share our journey and talk about our creative process. Whew…that’s all for now, but I will get in touch again right before the campaign ends to send last minute reminders. Feel free to share this newsletter (or the campaign) to anyone you think would enjoy it. :)
Take care, Desi Last week, I did something I never, ever thought I would do. I resigned from teaching. It was my dream job. The one I was set to do for 30+ years until retirement. And I chose to walk away. Why? There are so many reasons--more than I can actually explain well in a single newsletter post. Maybe I’ll write a memoir about it someday, lol. Honestly, I'm still processing this transition, and I feel like I will be for some time. However, if I had to boil my rationale down to a single word it would be this: Changes. Changes in teaching--pretty much all aspects of the job. Changes in my priorities. Changes in me. This decision to leave did not come easily or impulsively. It was one I agonized over for years. It was scary. It was filled with unknowns compared to the relative predictability of teaching. It was uncomfortable. But last year, I decided to make an exit plan. I started freelancing as a copywriter for advertising and marketing, and I took classes to develop my portfolio. All while teaching English full-time. And being a baseball mom and a wife. Needless to say, it was the most grueling 18 months of my life. ^^me this past year. Forever thankful for Jon’s help and tireless support. Now, I’m working as a copywriter at an advertising agency. This world feels so different (in good ways) from the world I just left, and it sometimes feels a little…unreal. Like I’m going to wake up and be back to my old “normal”: sitting in my classroom, grading tests and essays, and hearing the bells ring every 55 minutes. This process reminds me of a David Bowie song--also called “Changes”--which has these lyrics that really resonated with me: Chorus: Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes (Turn and face the strange) Ch-ch-changes, don't want to be a richer man Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes (Turn and face the strange) Ch-ch-changes, just gonna have to be a different man Time may change me But I can't trace time One of my students this year wrote an essay, and in their piece, they asserted the importance of being comfortable with discomfort. In that space, we can discover our potential and find the most growth. That idea really stuck with me, so much so that I read the essay to my own kids because I wanted them to understand that healthy discomfort shouldn’t be avoided. It is a stepping stone into a better, stronger, wiser version of ourselves. Packing up my classroom, saying tearful goodbyes to my beloved students and colleagues, and starting a brand new job in a brand new industry has definitely been uncomfortable. ^^me when the emotions hit. Reader, I was no match for the torrent of tears that flooded me on my last week. In fact, saying goodbye to this part of my life was one of the hardest things I’ve done in a long, long time. But I’m embracing the hard things. The discomfort. The unknown. All of it. Instead of dwelling on the “what was,” I’m going to allow myself to lean on the “what could be.” Here’s the David Bowie song if you’d like to listen: Pet Pics: ^^Our cats and pup are always on the lookout from their favorite spots around the house. Current Read: Raymie Nightingale by Kate DiCamillo I just started reading Raymie Nightingale, a middle grade book by Kate DiCamillo. It centers the story of a 10 year-old girl reeling from the sudden and unexpected abandonment from her father. Raymie constructs an elaborate plan to win him back, but it is clear from the start that the plan will not work. In the meantime, she develops an unlikely friendship with two other girls dealing with their own heartbreaks. DiCamillo puts a lot of heart and energy into this story without making it overly tragic. With short chapters and an engaging pace, DiCamillo is able to help us navigate through these characters’ genuine and sometimes messy emotions while keeping us hopeful that they will find some healing. Topics: Grief, Loss, Friendship, Coming of Age, Family Writing Update: Jon and I are hard at work in preparation for the launch of our Crowfundr Campaign later this summer. I will be announcing the official date soon. This story is one we have enjoyed developing, and we are so excited to bring it out into the world! Here is a new version of our book cover: I’m loving Jon’s character re-designs! Can you spot which cartoon and children’s book characters inspired this design? Hint: look at the faces and legs/feet. Sanity Corner: I’m a big fan of Lo-Fi music, especially when I’m working on anything having to do with writing, editing, or revising. I’ve recently discovered this station, which plays Lo-Fi versions of alternative/rock music from the 90s. I can’t work in silence, so instrument music is soothing and gets my creative juices flowing. What music do you like to listen to while working? I’d love to hear your recommendations! Also, Jon recently bought us coffee from a local Yemeni Coffee Shop, called Qamaria. It was delicious! I love that it’s a hot spot just a short walk away. Because of Qamaria, I realized that adding a small pinch of spices like the ones pictured below is a game changer for coffee. I strongly recommend trying this if you’re a coffee drinker.
That’s it for June. I will definitely be reaching out in July with more updates, so stay tuned! Thank you for reading! If you have any friends who’d like this newsletter, feel free to share this with them. :) Take care, Desi |
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