They say “breaking up is hard to do.” And if we’re talking about relationships, yes. It is hard. But when it comes to doing work—especially creative work—breaking things up doesn't just make things easier to do. It’s essential. Let me explain. About two years ago, when I sent a new full manuscript to our agent, I thought the story was finished. Dear reader, it wasn’t done. Far from it. I was the one who was done, apparently. So when she responded with several pages of editorial notes, I literally blacked out. I wasn’t mad. The notes were spot on. I was just completely drained of energy from everything—and I mean everything—life had thrown at me, which is another story for another post. At that point, I decided that I needed to focus on just surviving each week. Then I put the manuscript away and couldn’t look at it for nearly two years. Throughout that time, it kept gnawing at me. This was a story I wanted to tell. It was a more emotional one, a more difficult one. But I just couldn’t muster the energy to work through it. Finally, my brain said, “OKAY, fine! I’ll do this thing.” But it still felt like too much. Too big and overwhelming for my perpetually overloaded mind to tackle. So I decided to trick it. I told myself that I just need to do one page at a time. Just one. And if I do more, great! So I made it a point to wrestle with one page a day. After that was done, I’d add a sticker to the chart. My goal was to do some hardcore revision on 100 pages, since those were the hardest, which is why the chart has 100 boxes. Okay, sure. It’s an elementary school vibe. But I’m telling you: it works! Doing this for several days actually lifted me from my creativity block and helped me build some much needed momentum. And actually seeing my progress has been very motivating. So if you’re facing a big project and you feel paralyzed by the sheer size and scope of it, trick your mind. Break it up. You don’t need stickers. But you DO want to try to do one single, quantifiable piece at a time. Because baby steps are still steps. After a few days of this, my hope is that you’ll look back and feel good about your progress. And that’s how life works, isn’t it? It’s not about having these gigantic, Earth-shattering accomplishments each and every day. It’s the habitual small actions we take that eventually add up to meaningful results. Writing Updates: Aside from me re-working a new manuscript, Jon’s nearly done inking the pages for the THREE BEE HONEY Crowdfundr campaign. This endeavor has been much slower than we’d like, but we’re making progress each day. Jon’s even been inking pages during our sons’ baseball games, as you can see here. Current Read: Hello, Universe, by Erin Entrada Kelly I just started reading this book, which explores friendships that surprise us and the self-acceptance that grounds us. Right away, I was pulled into Hello, Universe as it opens with Virgil, a shy boy who’s guarding a big secret. Often misunderstood by his family, Virgil struggles with the angst of growing up and not fitting in. Each chapter switches point-of-view between the four middle school characters, which kept me turning the pages. Furthermore, I love how even the supporting characters are developed with so much depth and personality: like Virgil’s opinionated grandma, Lola, who’s from the Philippines. Kelly expertly plots each scene, twisting it in ways that force Virgil into an adventure with these unlikely friends. While I haven’t finished the book yet, I already can see how rich the characters are in the world Kelly built. This is definitely a story I would’ve found solace in during my middle school years. Pet Pics: Lilo is just like me: if it’s under 70 degrees outside, we’re freezing and MUST wear a hoodie all day. Amelie and Finn try their best to fit on top of their tower and watch the rainfall. Sanity Corner: I’m an absolute sucker for inspirational quotes. So much so that I keep a growing list of them on my phone. Later, when I want to share one with a friend or a stranger, boom! I’ve got the perfect, mic-dropping line. Well, maybe it’s not mic-dropping. But it’s at least thought-provoking. And that’s good enough for me. I also have this calendar with quotes for each day of the year. It’s a very small but fun way to set the tone for the day. The insufferable teacher in me sometimes asks one of my kids to read it aloud and share what they think it means. I can’t help but turn everything into a teachable moment. #sorrynotsorry That’s all for today. Thank you so much for reading! I’ll be in touch again next month.
Feel free to share this little newsletter with anyone who’d enjoy it! :) Take care, Desi
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I hate clutter. I hate how stressful and overwhelming it feels to be around a lot of stuff—especially when dealing with a small amount of space. In fact, my ideal home would look like an Ikea catalog if I had any control over my living situation (I don’t…I have kids and pets lol). My home would be a soft, comfortable, and functional space, but definitely minimal. And simple. However, unlike our physical realm, our minds have infinite space for whatever we want to pack it with. And because ideas need inspiration and our ideas come from our beautiful brains, it’s helpful to deposit lots of details instead of keeping it clutter free. So it’s time to fill ‘er up. Pack it with all kinds of information. Observations. Trivia. Questions. Everything. But all that inspiration hoarding shouldn’t come from one place (I’m looking at you, TikTok). Don’t rely on social media for all of your “research.” Get outside and look around. Notice what you notice. What people are doing. What they’re wearing. What they’re NOT doing. How people are eating. Which places attract people and why. Which places need upkeep. And if you’re stuck on a personal or work project or feeling “blah” about something that feels stale or you're just out of dank meme material, change your routine. Then download every detail you can about your day. I’ve started using this strategy myself, and it has improved my ability to brainstorm ideas more quickly. Now when I stare at my screen, I can make the cursor move on command with a list of some starter ideas. And some of those have the potential to actually be good ones. Picasso once said that “Inspiration exists, but it has to find you working.” So work at it by shaking things up and noticing the world around you. Then commit what you observe to your memory. You never know when it might come in handy when you need some fresh inspiration down the line. Current Read: How to Get Ideas, by Jack Foster My earlier manifesto was inspired by this book. Jack Foster does a great job of inspiring and teaching us how to turn on that radar in our minds to find ideas. They are all around us, if we pay attention. How to Get Ideas is a super easy read and great for anyone who wants to find inspiration, whether it is for work or personal projects. One specific exercise he suggests is to spend time really, truly observing our surroundings and then write down specific observations we have each day, which can be completely random. But the act of noticing helps us exercise that inner muscle and see more going forward. Here are some things I noted on day one during my work commute on the train: -Most people’s heads were down, looking at their phones. -A teenage boy had his basketball shoes untied and seemed unbothered by it. I also noted how the untied laces touching the train floor gave me the ick. -A man standing on the train was reading an art history book with black and white images. -I’ve been reading a new poem each day, and this one poem was about loss and how we hide our grief in the shadows of our smiles. #deep Pet Pics: Lilo being a brave little pup as she gets her annual shots. Don’t worry, she got extra cuddles. Amelie soaks up a little sunshine (and superiority) from her window perch. Garden Update: Our lemon and grapefruit trees have no chill and produced a lot of fruit this month. At first, I wasn’t thrilled about grapefruit—I didn’t eat it growing up. But now in my ripening years, I’ve developed a taste and enjoy them without any added sweetener. No judgment here if you like a little sugar on yours, lol. Sanity Corner: Jon got me into this podcast called Ologies, with Allie Ward, where she interviews experts on everything from black holes to apples to near death experiences. Every episode is fascinating and super engaging (Allie is such a funny host!). I’m always looking forward to learning from Allie and her team.
She also has “Smologies,” which are shorter, kid-friendly episodes for younger audiences. Please check it out, and challenge yourself to listen to something you know nothing about. As you listen, the episode will suck you right into that wonderful rabbit hole of curiosities. That’s all for today. Thank you so much for reading! I’ll be in touch again soon. Feel free to share this little newsletter with your friends! :) Take care, Desi Here’s a short, sweet poem by one of my favorite poets: Just as the hare is zipping across the finish line, the tortoise has stopped once again by the roadside, this time to stick out his neck and nibble a bit of sweet grass, unlike the previous time when he was distracted by a bee humming in the heart of a wildflower. ~ Billy Collins, Horoscopes for the Dead This poem reminds me of the Frog and Toad memes I started seeing on the Interwebs about a year ago: a Gen Z reaction against hustle culture. I’ve always operated like the hare in Collins’ poem. But I’ve envied the tortoise and have realized how wise he really is. We’re all racing somewhere. Racing to the job title. Racing to the accolades. Racing—and stressing and worrying along the way—to whichever status symbol that tells the world we finally made it. But who really cares? The world is so much bigger than us and our precious little myopic egos. It’s healthy to zoom out far away from ourselves and hold on to that perspective. It’s humbling, but it’s calming, too. A friend shared this in a moment of frustration, and I laughed. So true though, right? Once we cross a finish line, we manufacture another “finish line” to race toward. And then we go on social media, see what others have done, and feel inadequate all over again. Then we dream up new benchmarks. It goes on and on. And it’s exhausting. Sure, we can set goals and strive for them. But that requires balance. We need to remember to stop by the roadside once in a while. Touch the soft grass, feel the breeze and warm sun on our skin. Like Frog and Toad: My goal is to do this more myself. And I’ve been surprised by how hard it is after being conditioned to rush and race from one task to the other for so many years. So slow down. Be present. Enjoy the journey and stop to marvel at the insects along the way. There’s no rush. Writing Update: Jon has finished inking page 40 of Three Bee Honey—hooray! Progress has been slower than we’d hoped, but we’re inching closer each day. Here’s a sneak peek at one of the pages with Claire, Hannah, and Abi learning about the waggle dance: So cute! Recent Read: The Bluest Eye, by Toni Morrison I read this book back in college. And now that I’ve had more life experience under my belt, I felt it was worth revisiting, and I’m enjoying it even more. I also wanted to re-read it since it recently stirred up so much controversy and has even been banned in school districts around the country. The Bluest Eye explores beauty standards and racial identity. It’s about a Black girl named Pecola who is growing up in the Jim Crow South. She dreams of having blue eyes because she feels that will make her beautiful, and in that yearning, we see the pain and tragedy that inspires it. Toni Morrison’s prose is both beautiful and raw. Every book I’ve read by her is filled with passages that make me slam on the breaks, reverse, and re-read because I’m so shocked she actually “went there.” While her stories aren’t for the faint of heart, and this one explores many uncomfortable topics (definitely not for young ones), they cut to the core of human nature with devastating elegance and should be read by as many people as possible. I highly recommend this book! Pet Pics: Lilo enjoying a lazy moment (and a cozy sweater) as her mom works. Finn keeping an eye out for his special outdoor cat friend. Garden Update: Our blood oranges are back in bloom, which means some yummy juice in the mornings. In the past, we’ve made marmalade with the fruit, but life is just too crazy at the moment, so maybe next year. Sanity Corner:
Circling back to the poem by Billy Collins, one of the things I love to do when I want to slow down is going on walks. When I’m in the office or working from home, I try to take a break and go outside to clear my head. Just a 10 minute walk works wonders. If you can, squeeze in one 10 minute walk into your daily routine: before work, during the work day, or after. If we can spend 10-30 minutes doom scrolling, we can manage a short walk. :) It’s well worth the effort. Welp...that’s all for this month. Thank you so much for reading! I’ll be in touch again in February. :) Take care, Desi I hope you all had a restful holiday with your loved ones! I finally have a second to breathe after the craziness of the holidays, and I wanted to get in touch before the ball drops in 2024. Plus let’s face it: my productivity took a precipitous drop this week. As we disembark from the absolute rollercoaster that was 2023, I thought I’d reflect on the ups and downs of the past 12 months. Challenges:
Highlights:
I won’t kid myself by anticipating 2024 will be a smooth ride by any stretch of the imagination. After all, I’m an elder millennial who’s lived through decades of “unprecedented events.” But I know we have the tools to survive what comes our way, which reminds me of an old proverb: “A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.” Writing Update: Jon is still inking the TBH pages. Juggling parenting and teaching middle school and life is hard, fam. However, he’s getting the pages done--slowly but surely. Jon at the end of the work day—and at the end of 2023. Recent Read: The Creative Act, by Rick Rubin A fellow copywriter at work recommended this book a few months ago. Around the same time, Jon bought it and loved it. Once he finished, he passed The Creative Act to me to read for inspiration through some serious writer’s block I was having. This book is 100% deserving of all the hype. I’ve felt grounded by Rick Rubin’s immense wisdom. And I mean so. Much. Wisdom. Another thing I’ve grown to appreciate in non-fiction books like this one: I love the short chapters. We are always hustling and rushing from one thing to the next, but if I have 10 minutes or so, I can read a chapter, fully digest it, and feel like I learned something instead of stopping halfway and letting the main idea dissipate into thin air. Pet Pics: Lilo turned 2 on Christmas Eve! Here she is with her little holiday headband. Here are Finn and Amelie working hard at competitive napping. Sanity Corner: I know I’m late to the game, but I finally started using “Do Not Disturb” mode on my phone. And holy moly—what a difference it has made!
Text messages can be a huge distraction when you’re trying to establish a workflow or focus on other tasks--even if that TikTok video your friend sent IS hilarious. It’s been so effective at blocking notifications, that I’ve set my phone to DND every day, even on weekends. If you haven’t tried “Do Not Disturb,” I strongly recommend it if you want to reduce distractions. That’s it for now. Thank you so much for reading! I’ll be in touch again in 2024. Have a Happy New Year, everyone! :) Take care, Desi Recently, a former student reached out to grab some lunch. So we met up at a local cafe when she was finished with her college classes. Having been out of the classroom for over five months, I felt like I’ve been shedding my “teacher” identity. No longer reacting to the bell each hour. No longer grading papers every single day. But hearing her exclaim, “Mrs. St. Amant!” brought me back to that part of myself. Me hearing “Mrs. St. Amant” for the first time in months. We chatted about our lives and what we were up to. She told me how she was enjoying her college experience and meeting new people with similar interests. When she asked me about my job, I shared how much fun I was having working in such a different world, but I also mentioned the feeling of uncertainty and how uncomfortable it felt to grapple with more unknowns nowadays. She smiled and said, “I remember when you talked to us about college…how we were so anxious and worried about getting an acceptance. You said that things have a way of working out. Remember?” Yep. I remembered saying that. How easy it was for my old self to say. If only the old Desi knew what was in store. Then she continued, “Once we made our college decisions, we were still anxious. But this time, it was about our future and whether or not we made the right choice.” I smiled. It was all coming back to me. And it felt so bittersweet this time. I sipped my tea and listened. She added, “You told us that we don’t change when we’re comfortable. When we experience discomfort, we can grow into our better selves.” I chuckled. Dang, that Mrs. St. Amant could be wise…sometimes. At that moment, I realized that I needed to hear those words. And I was so filled with gratitude that my former student gave me such a helpful reminder from my past. Sometimes our past comes back to haunt us. But if we’re lucky, our past will come back to guide us just when we need it. I’ll leave you with a quote from one of my favorite poets, Maya Angelou: “I have great respect for the past. If you don’t know where you’ve come from, you don’t know where you’re going. I have respect for the past, but I’m a person of the moment. I’m here, and I do my best to be completely centered at the place I’m at, then I go forward to the next place.” Writing Update: Jon has finished penciling the comic. People, he has FINISHED. Life was wayyyy busier than we had predicted. Now he’s inking the pages. The more complex pages take a bit longer (due to more detail), but things are moving along. We’re also working on strengthening a concept for Ruby & Copper, a story we’d been chewing on for the past year. We love the characters and have been brainstorming concepts, and we finally feel like we have a solid idea. Working logline: Ruby wants nothing more than to be accepted by her community, and she feels that winning the local baking competition will get her there. But her inner monster, Egara, keeps getting in the way. She must learn to tame Egara or she’ll lose the last connection to her town. Here it is, our very first peek at an Egara sketch! Recent Read: Steal Like an Artist, by Austin Kleon This book was such a fun, quick read! I finished it after two days (I could’ve finished it in one day if I didn’t have work). Kleon’s writing style is accessible, engaging, and funny. I dog-eared many pages as I read his insights. Furthermore, I also appreciated how Kleon included illustrations to make each point super clear and memorable. Beyond his life lessons and insights on creativity, what I loved most was how the book gives us permission to seek inspiration from other ideas. Unlike imitation or plagiarism, we’re giving the inspiration our own twist and making it new and fresh (hence, “stealing” like an artist). This is a book I’ll definitely re-read when I’m in a rut and need some quick inspiration to get going again! Pet Pics: Finn and Amelie are back to being besties despite Finn hanging out with Lilo more often lately. Meanwhile, Lilo loves to get snuggly in her blanket on my work from home days. Sanity Corner: This is a little late, but Jon and I watched Fantastic Fungi a few months ago and found it so fascinating. We had no idea what to expect, but it was such an engaging and intriguing documentary. The complexity of fungi and the potential implications for helping people suffering with mental illness gives me hope. I look forward to seeing more research on this plant’s potential for healing. That’s it for now. Thank you so much for reading! I’ll be in touch again in December.
If you have a bestie (or even a frenemy) who’d like this newsletter, don’t hesitate to share this with them. :) Take care, Desi I recently listened to a podcast, called “How Awe Transforms Us,” which mentioned a term, “collective effervescence,” coined by a French sociologist named Émile Durkheim. To put it simply, it’s when people gather energy for a shared purpose. Intrigued, I honed in on the examples of collective effervescence:
Love that “connection fuel.” In a world that feels so disconnected and isolating—despite our technological connection…or maybe because of it—we need to find a sense of collective effervescence more than ever. Collective effervescence (CE) ranges from the mundane to the sacred. It can be spontaneous or planned. It fills our human need to feel part of something bigger than ourselves. Ironically, it also makes our world feel smaller (in a good way): like we’re part of a “village.” In the U.S., we put individuality on a pedestal, but too often we forget that we are part of a larger society. This connection is not something that our phones or social media scrolling can replicate. It requires our full presence and engagement. However, this isn’t the same as the superficial “we’re family” statements we might’ve heard at work and now largely understand to be problematic. Some of my favorite CE instances: cheering with other parents at my kids’ baseball games. Or dancing at hula competition, where we literally had to dance as one. Even if we didn’t win, the energy I got from sharing that experience with others fed me for days. Now that I ride the train a few days a week for work, I’ve had more of these moments. One day, our train to Union Station experienced delays, eventually arriving only FOUR MINUTES before the last Metrolink to my Orange County was scheduled to leave. There were several of us in that train car who needed to catch that train home, so we all made a plan to try to make it. As the train doors opened, I held my bags tight and sprinted across the station with the other riders. Complete strangers just minutes ago, us fellow commuters cheered each other on as we ran up the stairs and dodged other passengers. With about a minute to spare, we all made it onto the train. Our middle-aged muscles burned and we gasped for air. But dammit: we did it. With that said, in what ways have you experienced collective effervescence recently? Which experiences have stood out in your memory? Moreover, pursuing creative endeavors can be isolating, especially when you’re hitting a rut or experiencing rejections. So when you’re feeling “meh,” consider how you can curate collective effervescence and feel less alone. When you feed your spirit, you may find more energy to overcome creative challenges. I’ll leave you with this Herman Mellville quote, “We cannot live only for ourselves. A thousand fibers connect us with our fellow men.” Writing Update: Jon’s almost done with the most tedious, time-consuming part of making a graphic novel: the penciling stage. Life has been SO crazy with school, work, the kids’ activities and appointments, and other unexpected hiccups. Next, Jon will ink and color the pages. Fingers crossed that these next few months will be kind to us and allow him to catch up. If you didn’t get a chance to purchase a book, visit our site and get one asap. We’ll be closing the storefront site in one week: Monday, 11/6 at 9am, so don’t miss your chance! Recent Read: Fante Bukowski 2, by Noah Van Sciver I randomly found this graphic novel in our bookshelf and gobbled it up quickly. It’s a hilarious story about a struggling writer named Fante Bukowski, who dreams of being a successful writer, yearning for credibility and respect in the writing world. However, his hubris and comical lack of talent keeps getting in the way. I laughed out loud at certain scenes and how painfully relatable they were, like this one: If you are a writer, an artist, or do anything creative, pick up Fante Bukowski. It's a fun and enjoyable read! Pet Pics: Lilo and Finn are practically besties now. Amelie isn’t thrilled, so she’s keeping her distance. But worry not: we’re offering Amelie lots of emotional support as she adapts to this change. Sanity Corner: #1: Here’s another show we’ve been watching as a family: How to Get Rich. The title is a bit misleading (in my humble opinion) because it’s not about “getting rich,” per se—it’s about maximizing one’s financial well-being. This can involve starting your own business, getting out of debt, or saving enough to afford a new place to live. The host, Ramit Sethi, is a financial expert who helps various people overcome financial challenges and meet their personal financial goals. The show is super engaging and leans in on the stories behind each person. As Ramit helps each client, he also integrates important lessons and tips for us to be more informed. I think financial literacy should be taught in schools, and we’re seeing the impact of not educating generations of kids about handling finances. The fact that my kids ask to watch this means I can definitely give it a big thumbs up! #2: Our Dia De Los Muertos Altar We’ve added a few more family members to our altar this year. But honoring and remembering them has brought us some peace and comfort. ❤️❤️ Garden Updates: Our pomegranate haul from this month. We actually picked about three times the amount that you see in the picture, but we shared a lot of fruit with friends and family. Thank you so much for reading! I’ll be in touch again next month with more updates.
If you know someone who’d like this newsletter, don’t hesitate to share this with them. :) Take care, Desi Ever notice how angry people seem nowadays? Like big mad. Triggered by the smallest provocation, raging on the road, even cursing out service workers for making a mistake on an order. I could go on and on. It’s all hit a tipping point. But in addition to some serious therapy, I think what the world needs is a piñata. Yes, a piñata. I know it’s a bit strange, but hear me out. Over the past few months, I’ve attended parties that included piñatas. And these weren’t all kids’ birthday parties either. But these gatherings all had one thing in common: a big, colorful piñata. A colorful piñata we were not just gonna hit, but absolutely destroy. Me when I get in front of any pinata--get that blindfold ready! And I must say, the act of taking a swing at one is immensely satisfying. Then I thought about a podcast I recently heard about this festival in Italy called The Battle of the Oranges. The citizens of Ivrea gather oranges, and each winter for three days, they throw the oranges at each other. Like a water balloon fight, but more bruise-inducing. And why do they do this? The villagers seek catharsis, which means “the process of releasing.” This is a way for everyone to let out all pent up negative emotions, angst, and resentments. The local leaders plan around this event, including clean ups after the fact, making this well-organized chaos. And people can decide not to partake if they choose. As author Jon Mooallem describes, the residents “would throw the oranges very hard, very viciously, often while screaming profanities at their targets or yowling like Braveheart, and they would throw the oranges for hours, until their eyebrows were matted with pulp and their shirts soaked through.” At the same time, this battle was healing, as “they would also keep smiling as they threw the oranges, embracing and joking and cheering one another on, exhibiting with their total beings a deranged-seeming but euphoric sense of abandon and belonging — a freedom that was easy to envy but difficult to understand.” I think this tradition is brilliant. We all need our version of The Battle of the Oranges. While throwing citrus fruit can get a bit sticky or even cause real damage, hitting a piñata is way, way more manageable. But it still gives us that much-needed release. Feeling in a funk? Frustrated with someone in your life? Fed up with the indignities of adulthood? Take a bat or a stick, hang that piñata, and as it swings in the wind, give it a good, hard whack! I also think piñata companies need to get on this and market to adults. There’s a whole bunch of us ready to let out a lot of repressed energy, especially after these past few years. So next time you hit up a piñata shop (there are a bunch near me in Santa Ana), get yourself a “just because” piñata. Get yourself a “just in case” piñata for the tougher weeks. It’s calming. It’s cheaper than therapy. And the best part? There’s no birthday party required. Campaign Update: We’ve officially reached our stretch goal! Yay! That means everyone who has ordered a book (Worker Bee Package or higher) will get a free bookmark set with their shipment when the book comes out. Barney Smith from Story Comic interviewed Jon and me about our campaign. You can click here to listen to us talk about how we made it happen and the process of developing Three Bee Honey. If you want a sticker set and a print, be sure to put in your order before August 19th, the day our campaign ends! Pet Pics: Top: Finn likes to lay down right in the middle of my younger son’s army guy set up. Middle and Bottom: In this heat, the pets like to sleep under or near the fan to stay cool. Sanity Corner: The Brooklyn Public Library, in partnership with the Seattle Public Library, is combatting the recent wave of book censorship with a program called Books Unbanned. This program will grant access to audiobooks and eBooks to teens and young adults living anywhere in the U.S. Sadly, books are being banned all over the country, even in California.
But we have the tools to push back on this rampant censorship and protect everyone’s right to read. If you know a teen or young adult who would like a Books Unbanned card, please share this resource with them. That’s all for now, but I will get in touch again as the campaign winds down with last minute updates. We greatly appreciate your support! Feel free to share or forward this newsletter (or the campaign link) to anyone you think would enjoy it. :) Take care, Desi Hey friends! Our Crowdfundr campaign launches in just ONE day, and Jon and I are working hard behind the scenes to get everything as ready as possible. We just posted this video to kick off the launch. To commemorate this event, I thought I’d try a different angle in summarizing our experience preparing for a Crowdfundr. We are so excited to get Three Bee Honey out into the world, but it’s definitely been a LOT of work. But we’re making progress, and that alone is worth celebrating. The ABCs of Crowdfunding Anticipation building as you countdown the days Believing in yourself when the doubts get loud Cross the Rubicon and announce your campaign Don’t forget to take a shower! Endless edits on the story and the website Fall, but then get back up Go get some sleep, kiddo Have to complete way too much math to figure out a budget Infinite to-do lists Just keep swimming, even when life gets in the way Know that you’ll be okay, regardless Learning how to make TikToks, Reels, and Stories Manifest your daily goals #bossbabes Noticing that one mistake after it’s posted-gah! Optimize your network and make the ask Parent the kids and be generous with screens Quality videos take time--learn how to edit Remember to draft a few newsletters along the way Scrambling the week before launch Take breaks and laugh or watch a show Update your fans--even if it’s just your best friend Visit other campaigns to learn and offer support Whenever you can, update your subscribers Xtra rewards are always a good idea for your big spenders You can do it ALL--sike! Just kidding! Zen feeling that hits after it’s all done. The campaign hasn’t even launched yet, but I’m stoked at the level of encouragement and support we’ve gotten. Here are some cool things we have in store for you:
In addition, we have:
Subscribe to our campaign for updates. Thank you so much for joining us on this journey! Pet Pics: It’s Thursday, so I thought I’d throw in a few throwback pictures of our four-legged friends. Aren’t they the cutest?? *Squeeee!* Sanity Corner: Since the kids are on summer break, we have a chance to spend more time together, which has its pluses and minuses, for sure. To break up the long summer days, we have family game nights. One of our favorite games is Catan. It is a game of strategy, and the object is to use your resources to build as many settlements and cities as possible. That’s all for today, but I will get in touch again soon when the campaign goes live. We truly appreciate your support through this process! :)
Take care, Desi When in a stressful situation, I’ve always bristled when someone says “Think of your happy place.” I tried to imagine this ideal place, but it just didn’t feel real, causing this vision to slip between my fingers after mere moments. Plus, it was hard to find a quiet moment to meditate at all when I am constantly surrounded by kids at work and at home. However, I learned to create my happy place--one that I could go back to whenever I wanted even if I lacked peace and quiet. Because we know my life will NOT involve anything quiet. Allow me to go back in time a bit. When we visited Kauai last year, my husband told me that we should choose an album to play on repeat during our days there. That way, the memories of that trip and the emotions we felt would be embedded in that music. Full disclosure, Jon learned this trick from a longtime friend. The album we chose? Bloom, by Beach House. So after spending the day at the beach snorkeling and swimming with the fish and sea turtles, we played that album as we sat in the lanai behind the house. Bloom played in the background as we sipped our cold drinks and listened to the birds calling out from the tops of the palm trees behind our house. When the album finished, we played it again as the not-so-distant ocean waves crashed and the cool wind streamed through the balcony, making the ti leaves and hibiscus flowers dance on their branches. Bloom played as Jon drew on his iPad and I brainstormed ideas in my notebook. It played while the kids threw a baseball back and forth on the nearby grass. That was it: a core sensory memory locked. And a few days later, we arrived back home. Back to reality. Back to feeling spread thin and overwhelmed by our long list of to-dos, grading, appointments, etc. I immediately longed to return to that porch in Kauai. I faced grading deadlines and a huge pile of tasks. Getting caught up seemed impossible, but I slogged through the stress for a few weeks. Then, after a super taxing day at work, I slumped into the driver’s seat of my car, completely wiped out. Then I remembered a Thomas Fuller quote: “Memory is the treasure house of the mind wherein the monuments thereof are kept and preserved.” Our memories serve as monuments for us to revisit whenever we need to (and sometimes when we don’t want to, admittedly). We all have our painful monuments, but what about the joyful ones? The day we spent listening to Beach House came to mind, and I realized I hadn’t played that album since our vacation. I lumbered into the house with my shoulders knotted from the built up tension, and I played Bloom on our record player. Almost immediately, my tightly wound nerves came loose. My defensive posture dissolved from my shoulders. My mind ceased its racing. I just sat and took in that moment, devouring the calm it provided. I melted into the couch, letting my weight surrender to its cushions. For a few fleeting moments, I was back on that lanai. My mind had been transported to that magical island where the cool breezes made the palm trees dance. I found my happy place. Pet Pics: Speaking of happy places: my pets have no problem finding theirs. Here’s Lilo staying warm on cold and rainy days. Amelie and Finn always snuggle together (and usually prevent us from making our bed) Current Read: Atomic Habits by James Clear I just started reading James Clear’s book, Atomic Habits, which several people (including my husband) recommended. So far, it has lived up to the hype. Already, I’ve learned about the importance of small, incremental changes. Like compound interest in banking, these minute changes add up over time to lead to significant transformations. Some of my newest habits: -staying in touch with more friends by checking in frequently (even if just through text) -networking more and introducing myself to people I don’t know -walk outside every day Some habits I want to get back into: -write creatively every single day -wake up earlier (4am) -meditating Writing Update: In order to gain some experience in copywriting, I’ve been busy side hustling as a freelancer. It’s been an interesting learning experience, for sure. I’ve created social media posts, email blasts, marketing campaigns, and other deliverables. You can check out my portfolio here. It’s pretty scrappy, but I’ll be adding to it as I create more portfolio pieces. I didn’t get a chance to re-work my GN memoir synopsis, but my husband and I are going to re-focus on THREE BEE HONEY, starting with a redesign (based on feedback we’ve received). I’ll keep you updated in the coming months! Garden Update:
All this rain has made our yard pop off with countless weeds, which I have been picking like crazy. But I have to say, pulling them out and seeing the garden cleaned out does feel empowering, cathartic even. Maybe pulling weeds is feeding my need for control and therefore a form of therapy? Hmmm…..maybe I’m onto a new business model there. That’s it for March. I look forward to updating you in April! If you have any friends who’d like this newsletter, feel free to share! :) Take care, Desi Getting to the final draft of any project--whether it is a book, a poem, a resume, or even a monthly newsletter (ha!)--can be a frustrating and maddening process. It’s no wonder why people avoid writing as much as possible. And it’s why resources like ChatGPT have exploded. People want proficiency from the get go. They expect their thoughts to flow like a stream coursing peacefully over smooth river stones, pushed along by the power of inspiration from the heavens. [This would be nice, BUUUUT it’s just not realistic.] Anything less than perfect is not worth struggling through. Right? I see this with my students as well--some almost feel paralyzed at the sight of a blank page. “I have to put pen to paper and do what?” they ask with a helpless look in their eyes, losing all trust in their abilities. Sure, we can opt to wait for inspiration. [Okay, inspiration….any day now] But what if it doesn’t come? It can be elusive and distant. And when it doesn’t hit us, that’s a scary moment, for sure. The blank page. The insidious cursor floating on the document, mocking you with each beat. Henri Matisse once said, “Don’t wait for inspiration. It comes while working." And he’s right. We just need to start, embracing the messiness, and take it from there. Every finish needs a starting point. One way I get them past this hurdle is to follow Matisse’s advice: just write whatever comes to mind about that subject. Some call it freewriting. I set a timer for three or five minutes, and we “sprint” on paper. Grammar, spelling, punctuation--none of that matters (gasp!...I know). We just want to unlock the ideas and get as many of them on paper as possible. We see the masterful works by the creatives we admire, and wonder how we can ever be as good as them. But the truth is, they also struggle with this process. All creatives do. We just see the final, polished draft, yet they, too, experience a messy process to get there. Unbeknownst to us mortals, they also have to sift through the “junk” of their initial ideas--the good and the bad--and find what’s worth keeping and developing. We can’t edit a blank page. We just need to let the trash flow, give it time to air out, and then go through rounds of revisions and edits. We have to dispose of what’s not working, and hone in on what is working: that’s how we’ll discover the gem within. So embrace the messiness of the first draft: the key to getting to that polished piece. Now, excuse me as I roll up my sleeves, get back to my garbage drafts, and crank out some long-overdue revisions to create something worth treasuring. Pet Pics: Every once in a while, my phone chooses violence and reminds me of a “memory”--in the form of an old photo--from long ago. Rather than share current pet pictures, this is a throwback to our sweet border collie, Ross. He was five when we adopted him, and he was a wonderful dog. This is us at the Bodie State Historic Park (a real life ghost town). At the time this picture was taken, I was expecting our first son, but Ross was our first fur baby, and a wonderful companion and running buddy. He lived 16.5 years, and we miss him so much. I’m thankful for the wonderful years we had together. Current Read: Black Cake by Charmaine Wilkerson One of my friends gave me Black Cake, and I honestly didn’t know what to expect. I hadn’t heard of this book before. It is a beautifully written story about betrayal and the secrets that tie us together. The novel spans multiple generations, starting with two estranged siblings coming together to learn about their deceased mother’s past. It switches POV, which threw me off at first. However, once you get into it, the various perspectives flow and play off each other seamlessly, revealing the rich depth of Wilkerson’s cast. Though I have been chipping away at it slowly due to my schedule, I find myself haunted by their relationships and conflicts, and I look forward to reading more as I progress through each chapter. Writing Update: The only writing I’ve been able to do is commenting on student essays (yikes, but also lol). With finals and so many other obligations, this past month was a DOOZY. I really hope to get back on the horse in the next few months and re-work a synopsis for a graphic memoir I started working on this past summer. Keep your fingers crossed for me! Garden Update: Our lime tree is popping off, so much so that we can’t keep up. So I’ve been giving away limes (and blood oranges) to neighbors who want them. I hate to see great fruit rotting on the ground; I’d prefer sharing the wealth than letting these fruits go to waste. That's it for January. Stay tuned for some updates next month! :)
Take care, Desi |
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